Darn, I lost a cuticle.

February 13, 2009·

I have never been in a car accident *knock on wood* — (it’s Friday the 13th so karma is probably going to severely bite me in the ass for saying that). But, if I were to EVER be in a car accident, let alone be ejected from the vehicle, there are a few things that I would worry about.

1. Have I broken any bones?

2. Will I be able to walk?

3. Am I or is anyone else involved in the accident dead?

4. Did I remember to set my DVR to record LOST?

Things I would NOT be worrying about:

1. Whether or not I broke a nail.

That’s it. I wouldn’t worry if I broke my nails. In fact, that would be the last thing I would think about. “Aw crap, my car is totaled, I broke my left fibula, and my filangie is all messed up. But none of those things are my concern because my MANICURE IS RUINED.

Shell cut you. No, seriously.
She'll cut you. No, seriously.

Well, Lee Redmond, the woman listed in the Guiness Book of World Record’s for her LONG fingernails, measuring a total of 28 feet long (the longest being her right thumb measuring 2 feet 11 inches), was in an accident early Tuesday (Feb. 10th) and lost/broke/severed her nails in the crash. Redmond had not cut her nails since 1979. The headline reads: “Woman’s record-length fingernails broken in crash.” Because that’s what makes the story.

I guess if I hadn’t cut my nails since 1979 I would be upset too. I guess I’ll never know, because I would never be that crazy as to NOT CUT MY NAILS FOR 30 YEARS.

All for now.

**Oh, and she went on Ellen a few years back. Watch the clip here. It’s HILARIOUS.