The Keys to NOT Letting Money Become a Relationship Killer in Marriage, Dating, Friendships, or Family


  1. Hi, Great article. I agree with everything you have said. I do have one question that my fiance is struggling with. Her Roth IRA has almost 13,000 dollars in that she has saved up since she has been 18. I am more like you and have struggled with money all my life but I am now taking steps to get out of debt and make things right. Sarah does want to combine bank accounts and is wanting to put a budget together and do things together. we are both in agreement with this. However she does not want to put me on her ROTH account. She is struggling with this because she worked so hard to get it to where it is and I have not. She is struggling with trusting me with this large amount of money due to my family history of living check to check. No that I have ever spent large amounts of money irresponsibly. Or that I have given her a reason to think I would take the money out or use it without her consent. I am working a full time job as a social worker and a part time job to help pay off debt. I am taking steps by making a budget and trying very hard to break my family history and live by it. Can I get your thoughts on this?

    Thank you.

    1. hey brandon! thank you for reading and for your comment. would you mind if i answered this in an upcoming money post? i want to make sure i thoughtfully answer your question and really take it to heart… and i think there are plenty of other people out there who could relate!

  2. This post is timely. Or maybe it was divine intervention because there are some money issues brewing in my relationship at this very moment. Anyway, I’ve always believed in the your account, my account, our account concept for the very reasons you mentioned. But after reading your post I must admit that I’ve been swayed. I never looked at it that way – putting it all together and then resharing after budgeting makes a lot more sense and seems like a better “our” concept than the separate and then “our” way of doing things. I must admit that it’s still a little hard to swallow but I agree it sounds like the best way to do marriage.

  3. Hey!
    Great and timely post. This really does help alleviate the stress and anxiety one feels when dealing with money and relationships. Great tips that I will put into action immediately! The app sounds really cool!

    It is reassuring and helpful to see someone in my age bracket sharing insight and their real struggles with money.

    Please keep the money posts coming!


  4. When my husband and I got married, I was in the beginnings of paying off a lot of debt. From the get go, he told me that it wasn’t my debt, it was our debt. It was incredibly sweet and accepting of him to tell me that, and it made me feel more at ease and that he wasn’t judging my bad decisions. Being on the same page definitely helps us communicate better.

    Great post, Molly!

  5. Great post, Molly! I have to say, Riley and I do have separate bank accounts (mostly out of laziness, haha) and it’s never a problem for us. I think the key is having the “our” mentality and open communication, including giving the other person access to your accounts and linking them so you can transfer money when one person runs low. I completely agree with you about being transparent! It’s mind-boggling to me how people can be married and know nothing about the other person’s debt history or credit!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.